My FH5 Log: File B9

Almost a decade ago while playing the original Forza Horizon on my XBOX 360, I sampled the Audi RS4 Avant B8 and I got hooked by its moves as well as its naturally-aspirated V8 engine that sounds like the old BMW M3 Coupe. Life was nearly cool for this high-performance wagon back then.

Now, the B9-spec Audi RS4 Avant has arrived as a prize car obtained from the Series 8 Hot Season Playlist and looks like it's time to move on from the practical party pooper and into the all-out slugfest that is ready to slug through any ball game like a real baller.

So, what's it all about the Audi RS4 Avant B9?

Unlike its B8 predecessor, the Audi RS4 Avant B9 replaced the old model's V8 engine with the 2.9 TFSi V6 BiTurbo engine derived from the second-generation RS5. It produces 450PS of power and 600Nm of torque while mated to an 8-speed Tiptronic transmission. It does 0-100kph in 4.1 seconds and it has a governed top speed of 250kph but it can be bumped up to 280kph with an optional extra.

As expected, the RS4 Avant B9 feels mild and tangy while in the middle of a "twist and shout" session on the road, probably because it doesn't have the wonderful feature that today's BMW M5 had. What this means, is this wagon on mild steroids prefers to grip rather than letting all out in the handling department. I guess Audi is very serious about their high-performance machines; they want to behave like normal Audis but in a big and exciting kind of way, Long story short but you get the picture.

Having expressed my disappointment over the RS4 Avant B9's mild driving feel, I was going to call it quits...unless there's a way to appreciate this model. With that...

Using my stylist skills, this RS4 Avant was given a thumbs-up approach, or to put it in Nino's context; MARS! See what I did? MARS!

With the out-of-context "insert Martian joke here" approach done, my RS4 is ready for the slugfest it will never forget. Send in the tape!

Looks rough and dirty at the end but she's a great slugger, isn't she?

Well-sculpted proportions, mild driving feel, turbocharged V6 engine, quattro all-wheel-drive, the RS4 Avant B9 is a slugger that needs to be appreciated as much as its B8 predecessor. Sure, it doesn't have the raw charm of its predecessor and the competition alike but it sure loves a good ball game in the end. Although not a wise choice for the fun-loving Festival participants, the RS4 B9 is quite a rising star of the show.

Guess I'm going to take a few painkillers after this. As expected, the grip is so cringy. Huhehe...

Audi RS4 Avant B9

2018 Audi RS4 Avant

The previous RS4 Avant is one heck of a brilliant Audi because even though for an everyday wagon, it looks and feels absolutely sexy as well as its animalistic V8 engine ever roared. We all missed that RS4 Avant and now, Audi unveiled the all-new model which is based on the Audi A4 B9 Avant model.

So, what's new on the B9-spec RS4 Avant, per se? Pay attention because what's under the hood is disturbing and it is. The old model's V8 engine has been thrown away to the great junkyard in the sky and in place lies the same 2.9 TFSi V6 BiTurbo engine that you get in today's RS5. That means, it produces 450PS of power and 600Nm of torque while mated to an 8-speed Tiptronic transmission. It does 0-100kph in 4.1 seconds, which is slightly quicker than the one it replaces while it can do a governed top speed of 250kph but it can be bumped up to 280kph by request, which pretty much is the same as the old one if I'm honest.

Sure, the new model has been quite an improvement from the old one apart from the added power from the small V6 turbo engine and replacing the 7-speed DCT with an 8-speed AT because some enthusiasts are unhappy with it, but what's unhappy about the new RS4 is the sound of it and thanks to the downsized engine, it's less shouty than the old model it replaces and you get the impression that it sounds like driving an ordinary estate that you normally use on a day-to-day basis, including shopping. Disappointing the sounds are, the new RS4's dynamics are rather mild indeed, even though it was improved from the ground up thanks to the platform it uses, resulting in a lighter and more rigid ride compared to the previous model.

On normal roads, the RS4 is pretty much civilized on the road because that's how Audis are made, perhaps no wonder some people won't want to be with someone driving an Audi for reasons known only to themselves, perhaps they don't call them entertaining or amusing, but when taken on the track, this is where the serious bit kicks in because even with the dynamic settings on, driving the new RS4 is like getting pummeled by a bear drinking Stella Artois. Remember, this car doesn't have that wonderful feature like the one from the Ford Focus RS, which means it's going to behave pretty much like a front-wheel-drive car and if you're too little, too late, you're be seeing stretch marks on your arms after this.

So much for a 79,800 Euro high-performance wagon but despite all that mild and tangy dynamics, it still works like a wagon should. It even has some room for some groceries and some stuff you bought at the thrift store and some seats for your mates, even families who are sticking with the one-child policy. Still, it's inappropriate to be called a family car because of the pricing, but the RS4 Avant is all about being the jack of all trades, all work and all play like when the world's gone mad thanks to the principle of Murphy's Law.

Fancy a super Audi wagon? No thanks. I'll just stick to the E63 Estate for the time being because it won't give me some stretch marks on my arms.

Photo: AUDI AG

Forza Horizon: Badlands Rumble

The arrival of the March Meguiar's Car Pack on Forza Horizon sees the arrival of three new-to-Forza German cars for us to joyride. Yes, those three new cars are German; one is a high-performance wagon, one is a rear-wheel drive hatchback, and one if a high-performance offroader. Need to say more?

This is a wagon you'd promised for...

First is this, the all new Audi RS4 Avant. Like its previous model, it has the same 4.2L V8 that produces the same power that you would expect from an M3 Coupe but without drawing quite so much attention to it. Like its previous model, that exhaust note kinda feels like a tribute to Pavarotti. It's as sonorous as the Chinese name of the Chevrolet Camaro (Ke Mai Luo) and this is the kind of car that doesn't want to kill you. Yes, really, the ride's good, the quattro permanent all-wheel drive's keeps you out in the crash zone and it's not as complicating to drive as the other cars. It maybe idiotic in the exterior design but the driving feel is not quite idiotic until you're starting to behave like a cannibal...

The one and only rear-wheel drive hatchback

For the first time in racing video game history, the second-generation BMW 1-Series has arrived and what you see here is the M135i, the newest member of the BMW M Performance Automobiles that were a bunch of normal BMW's with M genes included to deliver M-style precision in a normal Bimmer. Bimmer fans concerned about the discontinuation of the BMW 1M Coupe in Easter 2012 were soon reassured by the arrival of a much hotter version of the BMW 1-Series hatchback. While the M135i prove to be more than a worthwhile replacement for the 1M but the performance figures are a bit lacking. Despite all this, let's just remember that this is the only rear-wheel drive production hatchback we can all enjoy in Horizon. It's like The Doctor, who was the last of the time lords. The blend of wit, excitement and drama on the M135i were all here.

Oh, and beware of the military troops hunting you

Fans of Top Gear USA might remember that Tanner Foust once drove the G63 AMG while being hunted by the US Army and in the end, Tanner was busted by the army. Now, this is the much more bigger brother of the 63, the V12 powered G65 AMG. While it looked identical to the G-Wagen that Tanner drove while being chased by the army, the G65 is boosted with the 6.0L V12 twin-turbo engine mated with an AMG SPEEDSHIFT PLUS 7G‑TRONIC automatic transmission system. An AMG V12 engine with a 7-speed gearbox? Whoa, but this isn't the first time the G65 comes with that, it's the latest AMG SL65 that gave credit for it. But still, with all that brute power, luxurious interior, and the off-road capability that can make use in the game of KING or INFECTED at the Carson Golf Course near the Media Center, the G65 is truly a force to be reckoned with...

Oh yes, this would be a Badlands Rumble when those three came together to show off THE MOVES...

Forza 4: Who let the A4's out?

Oh, look who's booked in at the Top Gear Test Track on Forza Motorsport 4. It's those high-performance variants of the Audi A4 through the years. The S4 B5, the S4 B6, the RS4 B7, and the  S4 B8, those were high-performance models of the Audi A4 through the years but those cars are arguing that which one is better. To settle those differences, my inner Stigness send me to lap these cars round the Top Gear track one by one by one to find out which of these "A4 on steroids" is the best...

Let's start with the S4 B5




Based on the Typ 8D (B5) A4, the S4 succeeds from the first Audi C4 S4 when it was debuted in 1997 as part of the Audi A4 B5 minor change.

The B5 S4 is equipped with a 2.7L V6 twin-turbo engine which includes a cast iron cylinder block with two aluminum alloy cylinder heads. This engine produces 265PS of power and 400Nm of torque while mated with a 6-speed C90 manual transmission.

The sedan version was launched in 1997 while the station wagon variant, called the S4 Avant, was launched a year later. In 1999, the B5 S4 went on sale on the USA. Production ended in 2011 although it was sold alongside the A4 B6 through 2002 in North America.

The S4 B5 also makes motorsport history when this is the car of choice for Michael Galati at the 2001 SpeedVision World Challenge where he won the GT title in a Champion Racing S4, winning 4 races and made it to its first manufacturer's Championship.



The S4 B5 crosses the line in 1:32.861...

Now it's the B6's turn...




Following with the success of the B5 S4, the S4 model is now based on the Audi B6 A4, which was based on the Volkswagen Group B6 (PL46) platform. It was available in saloon, Avant, and Cabriolet.

For this model, the S4 B6 comes with the 4.2L V8 engine that can go 0 to 60mph in 5.6 seconds  in the saloon with manual transmission (Avant 5.8 s, Cabriolet 5.9 s) but American car magazine Motor Trend managed to make the S4 B6 go from 0 to 60 in less than five seconds.

In the USA, the S4 B6 was subjected to the $1,700 gas guzzler tax (combined 20.2 miles per US gallon (11.6 L/100 km; 24.3 mpg-imp)) for the six-speed manual sedan.



The B6 Audi S4 did it in 1:30.163...

Next up, the RS4 B7




The first RS4 was introduced in 1999 and went on sale in 2000 as an Avant-only model. From its discontinuation in 2001, Audi produced 6030 RS4 Avant models.

In 2005, the RS4 returned and it was based on the B7 Audi A4. It was available in the European public in mid 2006 and later in North America and up to its discontinuation in 2008, 10,000 units were made. It was available in three body variants; a sedan, an Avant, and a Cabriolet version.

Powered by a 4.2L FSi V8 engine and mated with a 6-speed manual transmission, the RS4 can accelerate from 0-60mph in 4.8 seconds while top speed is normally limted to 155mph.

The B7 RS4 marks a departure from the Audi RS cars tradition (where the previous RS 4 and RS 2 were available exclusively as Avants.) ever since the first Audi RS6. Unique features of the B7 RS4 are the smaller, flat bottomed steering wheel (complete with "Sport" button), Recaro shell-type race bucket seats with electrically inflatable upper and lower side bolsters, and carbon-ceramic brakes.

In Top Gear Season 7 Episode 2, Jeremy Clarkson races the RS4 against mountain climbers at the French Alps and in the end, the mountain climbers defeated the RS4. It went round the Top Gear Test track in 01:25.7.

In Top Gear Season 10 finale, James May drove the RS4 while Jeremy Clarkson's in the Mercedes-Benz C63 AMG and Richard Hammond's in the BMW M3 at the Ascari Race Resort in Spain.



The RS4 did it in 1:23.201, meaning not only I beat Stig's record, it beats the other two but would that lap time be more than enough to be beaten by the current-generation Audi S4 B8? Let's find out...




From the moment the Audi B8 A4 was launched in the 2007 Frankfurt Motor Show, this model is now based on the Volkswagen Group MLB/MLP platform. A year later, Audi has launched an S4 model which was based on the current B8 A4.

Beginning with the B8, the saloon and Avant version was available while the convertible variant was replaced by the Audi S5 Cabriolet in 2009, the year when it went on sale for the European public.

For this model, downsizing occured because the B8 S4 replaced the 4.2L V8 engine with a 3.0L TFSi V6 engine with forced induction via a Roots-style Eaton mechanical supercharger.

Even though it's an S model, the B8 S4 competes with the BMW 335i and the Infiniti G37 since Audi discontinued the Audi B7 RS4 and Audi has never made a competitor to the BMW M3. Optional features on the B8 S4 includes active rear differential, active steering and ultra-quick electrically-adjustable shocks (both via Audi Drive Select Package).

APR Motorsport competed the B8 S4 at the Grand-Am Continental Tire Sports Car Challenge Grand Sport (GS) class.



As it turns out, the S4 B8 managed to do it in 1:28.223, that's about over five seconds slower than the RS4 but still more quicker than the previous S4 models so I therefore conclude that the RS4 B7 is the winner of my Top Gear Forza Motorsport 4 comparisons....

Go pick the RS4 B7...because it's sonorous...

Audi RS4 Avant B8 (Typ 8K)

Out of the blue, a certain male told that he once watched a DVD about young women in their racing swimsuits doing somewhat...um...more animalistic. He said that it was the most intense, animalistic, erotic encounter of his life. If I was his friend, I want to tell him that there's something even more erotic than watching women in their skin-tight racing swimwears...

Kompromisslos anspruchsvoll

2013 Audi RS4 Avant

2013 Audi RS4 Avant

Here it is. The ultimate expression of car porn. If I was Taaj from Come Fly With Me, I would say "okay b****es, the p*ssy wagon has arrived!" because this really is a sport wagon with such fetishes. Once you're here, you'll know that this was the most intense, animalistic, erotic encounter of your life.

Under the hood, this feisty high performance sport wagon from Audi 4.2L V8 FSi engine that generates about 450PS of power and 430Nm of torque. 0-100kph takes about 4.7 seconds and top speed, well, like anything goes, a governed top speed of 250kph but it can be bump up to 280kph by request. It is a fast wagon and with its seven-speed S tronic dual clutch gearbox, this was immensely fast...sort of because if you put it in a race between this and the Cadillac CTS-V Wagon, I'm afraid that doesn't work because even though it has launch control, this Audi can't beat the American high-performance car in a shape of a station wagon, a car that soccer moms often use it for everyday use.

What about handling? As a sex toy, this is a bit too harsh and this feels like it's what you call it "unprotected sex" on the road because form every turn by turn, it feels like you've been wrestled by a young Russian woman in her skin-tight racing swimsuit. Even though it may have the quattro all-wheel drive system, the driving feel's a bit too mild and menacing. Not standard, not dynamic, too mild. As mild as a cup of San Mig Coffee 3-in-1 if you know what I mean but as menacing as a slaughterhouse next door. You have to be serious about handling this high performance Audi sport wagon and if it gets brutal, KEEP CALM AND YELL HAIDARAAAAAA!!!!!

And if by HAIDARAAAAAA!!!!!, well take a look at yourself. This really is the all new Audi RS4 Avant and if by Avant or estate version, you might be saying "LOL. Why no Saloon?", "WTF? Where's the RS4 Saloon?" There's a very bright reason for this, AUDI WILL NEVER MAKE A SALOON VERSION OF THE NEW RS4. You got me? Remember back from the old RS4 (typ B5)? Yep, available in wagon only when it came in 1999. This followed the trend of the first RS4 but that's general information to you all.

But still, even though it's available only in Avant grade, the new RS4 is all about being the most intense animalistic erotic encounter of your life when your foot's on the pedal and once you're driving the new RS4, the humping begins...Oh yeah...How do you like that, Fearghal? How's this for an erotic encounter? Apologies if too much NSFW stuff were there but that's the metaphor for the RS4 Avant because even though for an everyday wagon, it looks and feels absolutely sexy.

Available Colors: Ibisweiß, Suzukagrau Metallic, Pantherschwarz Kristalleffekt, Prismasilber Kristalleffekt, Daytonagrau Perleffekt, Misanorot Perleffekt, Phantomschwarz Perleffekt, and Sepangblau Perleffekt.

PRICE: 76,600 Euros

Photo: Audi AG