Friday, June 14, 2013

Let's Do The News! (June 14, 2013)

(cheers and applause)

JC: Unbelievable man! That's definitely quite a spectacular attack for Miami Heat.

RH: Yeah!

JC: So...I can't believe it's turning into a game of catch up because look...Spurs got Game 1, Heat got Game 2, Spurs got Game 3 with their 16 3-pointer record per game, and now Heat took Game 4 at the score of 109 to 93 against Spurs!

RH: I guess it was TOO HOT TO HANDLE. Eh?

(audience laughing)

JC: Yeah but one thing I really don't understand is that Miami Heat's always attracting too much foul every time when they're trying to make a score. Is this all part of a plan to prevent Miami from scoring or is it just phoney-baloney?

(audience laughing)

RH: I don't know. Maybe all those whistle-blowing against Heat gives Spurs a fighting chance to shoot, to dunk, or 3-pointer, whatever their disposal's throwing at...

(audience laughing)

JC: So, now that they're all tied by 2 wins and Game 5's on Sunday (Monday if you're in Asia), do you think it's going to be the Spurs' turn or will Miami takes it again for the win?

RH: I don't know but it's all in the order now. My money's on Spurs for the moment...

(audience laughing)

JC: Anyway, let's do the news!

JM: Okay, the news and listen up you millionaire big boys, there was this derelict car factory somewhere in America is for sale at around $975,000 (£622,400) and here's the pic...

The old Packard plant
(audience laughing)

RH: Oh wait...under 630,000 Pounds for some abandoned building? What's that?

JM: Well, this is the old Packard car factory. It's being auctioned off for under 630,000 Pounds due to tax delinquency for this 43 plots of land that will make up for this site. This building's built in 1903, closed in 1958, and has since been vandalized, pillaged and dismantled by trophy hunters.

JC: You know, if someone had that kind of money to buy this abandoned building, I might be expecting they'll turn this one into another hideout for the bad boys...

(audience laughing)

JC: I mean look at it! So derelict and so deserted, I bet that those turbo nerds use this as their safehouse and if by turbo nerds, that's another word for speedo boys.

(audience laughing)

RH: So now you're saying, another description for the word "boy racer" is speedo boy and now turbo nerd. Where did you get that word from, Clarkson?

JC: It's from Adventure Time! (ahem) IMAGINATION IS FOR TURBO NERDS!

(audience laughing)

JC: But anyway, it's not what they meant to use it because I have to use this new word to describe a "boy racer" because "speedo boy" is just so...last year but still I would use those words "speedo boy" and "turbo nerd" in case there's a boy racer in his modified car. It's like being chased by cops and then you're saying I'M A TURBO NERD! YOU CAN'T STOP ME!

(audience laughing)

JC: Also, when there's a new car that doesn't offer a turbocharged model, mostly Japanese cars, a certain "turbo nerd"'s going all Dr. D and then it's going to be some sort of "BEHOLD! THE TURBO-INATOR!"

(audience laughing)

JC:...and then goes bam bam bam, every single car has the "turbo" prefix, unnoticed! This is irritating!

(audience laughing)

JC: Now, while we're a bit too early about the 2013 Metro Manila Film Festival, there's going to be a twist happen at this year's film festival this Christmas 2013. Wanna guess what kind of twist was that?

RH: Lemme guess...new Mano Po?

(audience laughing)

JC: Come on, there's no more Mano Po for now. Anyway, the big twist for this year's festival is...wait for it...wait for it...No ‘Enteng’, ‘Panday’, ‘Shake, Rattle & Roll’ in next MMFF!

(awww)

JC: Yep. That's going to be a very big bombshell out there because this year's festival will no longer had  Enteng Kabisote, Ang Panday, Ina Montecillo and the rest of the horrifying creatures of the “Shake, Rattle and Roll”. Very sad but still, it's work in progress for what will be the eight films going to compete for this year's MMFF and the list will be revealed this June 18...

JM: But still, no Enteng Kabisote, no Panday, no Tanging Ina (because it's already ended in LAST NA 'TO), and no Shake Rattle and Roll because it's stopped at The Invasion.

(audience laughing)

JC: Speaking of invasion, anyone heard the news about some farmer in China arrested because of killing an alien?

(audience laughing)

JC: True! Here's the clip...



(audience laughing)

RH: So it turned out to be somewhat a fabricated story and the alien he killed was just an image made of rubber. So, no such thing as alien?

(audience laughing)

JC: Possibly but there's some more alien sightings because recently, in Holland, some Dutch accidentally took a picture of what this photographer thought to be some sort of UFO. I saw that in the Good Morning Club earlier and that news really questioned about the whole extra-terrestrial malarkey... I wonder if that pic does state if that one's a UFO or not. What do you think, folks?

(audience murmuring)

JC: Anyway, those who are using Facebook just now might have noticed that there's a new feature that works like Twitter. It's the hashtag feature that when every time clicks on this hashtag...well, this is just like Twitter except it's bigger in Facebook...

(audience laughing)

RH: So, Facebook's trying to be just like Twitter except they're bigger on the Facebook space, eh? Do you think Facebook tries to generate as much "trending topics" as possible just like Twitter?

(audience laughing)

JC: If possible, yes because Facebook's a bit big and Twitter's a bit small but despite differences, they're both a win-win in the social media craze because this is the world we live in. It's the 21st century. This is where everything changes, and you got to be ready!

(audience laughing)

JM: Anyway, that's the end of the news and guess what? We are nearly there to find out which is the best Phineas and Ferb song of all time and it's all down to two: It's now Summer Belongs To You vs. Everything's Better With Perry. So, what do you think folks? The finishing musical number from the Summer Belongs To You special or the opening musical number from Phineas and Ferb: Across the 2nd Dimension? The best way to find out which song became the top of the pops is tune in this June 28, Friday, at 8PM/ 7PM Central and find out!

No comments: